Monday, August 31, 2009

Mishee You

To, My Dear Tropic Bear

I had a very long chat with you yesterday night over a lot of issues. One of them was my ex. Perhaps what you said was right - I shouldn't have talked to him in the first place. Perhaps what you said was wrong because after all, I have no feelings for him anymore.

Yet, at that point of time, I didn't bother to think whether it was right or wrong. My main concern was that I have to make sure you are feeling okay. Anything to make you okay.

Sigh. I'm missing you so much right now.

The few days at the beginning of my departure, we might have situations like this, not able to talk to each other for hours.

Maybe I should start getting used to this.

But right now, I miss you..

Sunday, August 30, 2009

That Sense Of Admiration

Yes, the blog's title isn't called A sense of admiration. Instead, it's THAT sense of admiration. It's the special sense of admiring Tropic Bear.

Today, I was ranting to Tropic Bear about my problems, expecting only a pair of ears because just having someone to listen to you makes a world of difference.

Tropic Bear did better than that. He gave me advice. Very sensible advice.

He also told me about his thoughts which were really deep and stood out from what normal people think of.

Listening to his advice makes me realised how fortunate I am to find a guy who's sensible and loving at the same time. Not many people can be rational and emotional. Tropic Bear is equipped with both.

And at the point, I felt this whole new sense of admiration for him.

PS: About the last entry, I felt slightly hurt over that. However, I fit in his shoes and thought about how exhausted he was (poor him!). He's accompanying me tonight, so I guess that made up for it. Teehee.

Guilt

Feeling guilty can come in many ways.

It doesn't take you to cheat on your other half to feel it, neither do you need to have an unnecessary argument with doggie. Sometimes, when one is tired, we tend to regret the things that we do.

Last night was the day doggie created this blog, it felt so sweet when doggie told me about it. Unfortunately at that time doggie was busy, so I tried waiting for her to finish what she was doing. Tiredness overcame me and I couldn't go on waiting anymore, right now I wish I did.

I'm sowee doggie, a couple of hours later guilt engulfed me. Realization struck me that how insensitive I was towards your feelings. Sometimes tropic bear tries very hard to be the perfect partner but fails miserably.

And right now, he feels miserable. Will you forgive him?

A Bear That Loves You Dearly,
Tropic Bear

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Is all these worth it?

I've been searching for something. Well, I can't say what it is but lets' call it, say a table.

So, I have been searching for a table, any table will do ever since I completed my high school studies but with no luck. I did my pre-u and still no luck.

Now, how interested am I to search for this table? I frankly wonder. Today I got a slap (not literally) about me not putting in enough effort in my search for it.

Is it true? In fact, I'm also starting to wonder if I'm worth to be the owner of the table.

Now, with no table, will I look back one day, say ten years down the line and think, 'thank goodness I couldn't find a table back then. It would have rob an opportunity in present time.' Will I?

I don't know. It's too hard to tell where the future lies. And it doesn't help that I'm starting to doubt myself.

I can't stand the pressure anymore. I don't know what I'm typing. Gonna talk to Tropic Bear now. Bye.

First Post

Today marks the birth of this blog. I'm relieved! I had a blog which is by my own name and I can finally write anything I want under an anonymous name, simply 'Doggie'.

Yesterday, I read my diary to Tropic Bear about how we met. He was very touched and melted. Hence, when I realised that we can have a blog together, whether for the public's view or for just two of us, I jumped at the opportunity.

Tropic Bear has yet to know about this. I hope he likes the idea though. I'm thinking of posting my thoughts and feelings here next time. It would be easier to share these with my Tropic Bear.

Till her for now. Not sure will post up what but there will posts to come.

Love,
Doggie