Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Random :)

Hi again!

Lately I haven't been writing posts due to the impending finals which take up half of my time and the other half is reserved for doggie :) Doggie went out today for shopping and hopefully she'll buy something ( at least 1 item ) Hehe :P

Okaaayyy tropic bear suddenly sounds very greedy.. Anyway the gift tropic bear has in mind for her now sits waiting to be delivered, after all the red tape has been settled. Yay! Hopefully doggie will like it (she probably will) after all even I want it for myself. Just didn't had the heart to buy it all this while!

Anyway things are getting a little busy these days for tropic bear with all the honey-eating, tree-climbing and hunting to do. Haha! Gotcha right there :)

Enough of the small talk, main point of this post : Happy 4 months darling! <3

Tropic Bear

Monday, October 26, 2009

Four months

I went out with a friend today. A guy friend, to be exact.

I asked Tropic Bear for approval before I did.

However, just now, it suddenly dawn upon me that it must have taken a lot of trust for Tropic Bear (someone who's so protective. Haha) to let me go out with another guy.

And yet, his last words for me before I left was 'have fun'.

Superb guy, isn't he? :) I love you, my dear darling. Though I know you have no rights to control what I do but thank you for that. :)

Happy four months being together <3

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Tropic Bear is cute <3

I have a personal blog. After having not updated it for a very long time, I posted a blog entry and Tropic Bear commented a day right after that.

Doggie: How did you know I updated? You must have been lucky to just happen popping by at my blog!

Tropic Bear: I check your blog everyday. That's how I know.

Doggie: Why do you check everyday? You want to click on the links on my blog? You don't know how to spell so-and-so's blog link? *cute cute kid's voice*

Tropic Bear: Ya ya. How do you spell _____? *fakes spelling error*

LOL. I can't totally describe it but the scene was very cute!!! :D

There's something else I want to say too. Two days ago, I was very mad at Tropic Bear. People often argue not because of the topic that started the argument but rather how they argue. I remember being mad at Tropic Bear because he wanted to rush me off so that he won't scold me for something else that bothered him. I was very sad and mad because I should be there to listen and share the burden no?

(Tropic Bear later on told me that the reason why he held back his words because he was afraid of being angry out of insignificant issues and later on regretted it.)

After talking to Tropic Bear, I was feeling better until Tropic Bear got frustrated in comforting me (because he didn't know I was okay already) and said 'I don't wanna talk anymore'..

.. which sparked my anger because that sounded so irresponsible. Never have I end the conversation before because I don't wanna talk. Never did I not pick up his phone call because I don't wanna talk.

So I said 'bye bye' and angrily went to bed. I thought that he was pissed off too since he did not call back or message me.

He called me the next morning (like 7.30 am in the morning on a Saturday) apologising. I was still very mad (thinking that he's selfish because he woke me up so that he can clear the issue which in return will make him feel better). I went back to bed again and talked to him only a few hours later.

Conversation didn't go on well and I started having a slight doubt on whether this guy is reliable. Whatever he said sounded solely from his point of view, contradicting with the fact that he once said he loves me more than himself. I'm not asking him to put my life in front of his but it sounded as if everything he said wasn't meant from his heart.

I thought that me keep walking away from the conversation might just let him lose it and wanted to let this relationship go. However, later on, he messaged me saying that he's sorry which sounded much more sincere and that became sort of a wake-up call that I might have take things a little too far.

We later on talked and talked and became just as close as before. :)

Friends told me that they were angry at their boyfriends before and refused to pick up their calls. I can never have that heart to do so.. and I hope I never will.

Saturday, October 3, 2009



Today, was the first time you told me something that truly hurt me. I never thought those words would come out of you, after all we have been through. Maybe I have been possessive, or perhaps asking a little too much out of you.

All I wanted was just to talk, that was why I waited everyday for the whole week to call you. Maybe it was the wait that made me impatient. Or perhaps the lack of sleep contributed to me being demanding. When you said those words this morning, it came to me that how much it hurts to hear you say it. I'm trying my best to make it work and maybe it still isn't enough.

Perhaps I might have done something wrong that I don't even realize. If only you would tell me what I did wrong and let me correct it. I would work even harder to make sure this works. I truly love you and I still do.

There was once a certain someone asked me what would I do if you told me that you didn't want this anymore. My answer was firm that I would double my efforts to keep you around me. That was 3 months ago, what was the answer then it still hasn't changed.

I have missed you so much darling, maybe it's because you are occupied with a new life you don't realize how much I'm missing you right now. But deep down i hope you still do and I know that those words you said were words of frustration. Yet, it still hurts.

I Love You darling, I hope you still do.

Tropic Bear :'(